Friend, We’re Traveling Together
“Friend, we're traveling together.
Throw off your tiredness. Let me show you
one tiny spot of the beauty that cannot be spoken.
I'm like an ant that's gotten into the granary, ludicrously happy, and trying to lug out
a grain that's way too big.”
- Rumi, The Essential Rumi,
translated by Coleman Barks
(Oh, be still my heart. Rumi, you fountain of wisdom and beauty, you’ve done it again.)
The moment I first read these lines, I felt them reach deep into my heart. It was as if Rumi was speaking to me directly, across the centuries, calling out my fundamental human experience of feeling burdened by loneliness and offering its ultimate remedy, the balm of friendship. (Throw off my tiredness? Yes, please!) We’ve all got burdens that are either direct results of our health struggles, or contribute to them. We don’t feel good, we don’t have energy to do the things that nourish and inspire us, and this makes us feel even worse. It’s a vicious cycle. We know that there is magic in this life, that there is play and celebration and devotion, but we feel blocked from it because we don’t have enough energy/time/health to engage with it. Or perhaps we feel too sensitive and overwhelmed to venture out in the ways that we know would help us connect with the subtler, sweeter aspects of life. Thus, exhaustion begets exhaustion, overwhelm begets overwhelm, stagnation begets stagnation.
Enter the friend. The ally. The helping hand, the listening ear. Maybe it’s your health care practitioner, maybe it’s your buddy from grade school, maybe it’s your teacher. Simply the reminder that we are not alone, can help lighten some of our burden. Alliance is at the root of medicine.
Healing, especially from chronic illness, can be an arduous journey with lots of ups and downs. It’s easy to get fatigued and burnt out. It can be difficult to see beyond the immediate, to hold perspective when our suffering in the moment is speaking so loudly. Interacting with a skilled, sensitive health care provider can be like that friend of which Rumi speaks. We truly are traveling together in this life, intermittently tasting the joy and the hardship, the magic. We have to remind each other of the big picture and hold each other through the rough patches.
None of us can do it alone. People often ask me if I perform acupuncture on myself. The answer is no. I may sometimes put a needle in for headache or anxiety, but I know enough to know that a therapeutic relationship with a health care practitioner is the crucible for real change. I can’t see myself clearly enough to be my own doctor, because I’m looking from the inside. I need another person’s perspective to flesh out my experience and understanding of my health. And, when the going gets rough, I need someone else with that spark in their eye, reminding me that there is unspeakable beauty at every turn and it’s worth it to keep on giving my best. Alliance is at the root of medicine.